Ally was a beautiful girl.
A brave and kind woman.
With her optimistic point of view,
she made everyone happy.
Her shiny eyes and radiant smile spread a good mood.
She tried to take care of everyone, even after she lost herself.
In Ally’s first 14 years of living, she had nothing in common with the word abuse.
It was too terrible to be in her vocabulary.
But then, in that summer night, when the sky was red… it took away her mind and body.
Chapter 1: sunday
“Ally, you need to hurry!! The train’s leaving in five minutes “
That’s what Sarah, Ally’s best friend, said to her before they left for the party.
They both were 17.
Ally was wearing a red dress with black heels; the dress wasn’t short because she was too insecure.
Sarah was also wearing a dress, it was silver. She knew everyone was going to like her knee-short dress and she liked that feeling.
“I can’t walk in that heels, Sarah!!“, Ally wanted to wear sneakers at first, but Sarah reminded her of the dress code.
Sarah and Ally met at school, two years ago.
Ally was a shy and nerdy girl, while Sarah was the most popular girl in high school.
Kind of weird but opposites attract.
They made it to the train in time. Ally complained about her feet hurting the whole time, Sarah was doing her makeup because they ran out of time.
All she wanted was to look good. And she really did.
Twenty minutes later, when they arrived at the party, some boys were waiting outside.
“Sarah, you’re finally here!!“, that’s what one of the boys said. In fact, his name is Ryan.
Nobody noticed Ally, until someone pointed out her long dress.
“Oh, I thought it was going to be cold… but I was so wrong guys “, that’s what Ally replied to them with a fake smile.
She used to be a happy girl and she didn’t listen to the haters.
Not everyone liked Ally, but her family and friends did. That’s what made her so happy.
She was always there for everyone, even when nobody was there for her.
The music at the party was so loud, there were so many people. It was Ray’s, the most popular guy, birthday party.
Ally and Sarah spent the first hour together until Sarah left with some boys.
Sarah and Ray were a couple for years. In reality it was a toxic relationship.
Ally saw some people from the chess club, she joined them.
They had a lot of fun together, until it started to rain.
Regan asked Ally to stay, she didn’t want to go home because of her family problems.
Like we all know, Ally was a good friend. So, she stayed with Regan even though everyone around her was drunk and the weather was miserable.
Most of the guests were drunk or high, so they didn’t really care about the rain. But those who did, left the party.
Sarah asked Ally to leave, but she didn’t. While they were talking together, Regan left too.
After everyone danced for hours, some of them even took drugs, they left too.
So, there was only Ray’s clique left. And Ally.
Ally wanted to leave, she tried.
She didn’t succeed at first.
“Hey, Ally… come over “, The clique was staring at her after Joe said that.
Ally was scared but she stayed calm. After taking a few steps, she was there. Standing in front of Ray, Joe, Jackson and Clive.
“What’s wrong? “, Ally was so brave in that moment.
Everything could have happened that night.
They were still staring. It was silent.
“What are you all looking at? “, Ally was really confused.
After a few seconds, of nobody replying to her, she turned around and tried to leave the party.
“Where do you think you’re going Ally Thrones? “that’s what Jackson said after she tried to leave.
“I’m trying to go home, what’s the problem Jackson? “
They told her about the rumours they’ve heard about her. She explained to them, that she would never send inappropriate pictures of herself.
“Why is everyone spreading rumours about you “, Ally was confused again because that was the first time she heard about the rumours.
It was a weird evening, but Ally could finally leave after telling them things about her private life.
She didn’t think about what they said, for a long time after that.
It was 3am when Ally left the party, there were no more trains at that time in the morning, so she decided to walk.
Her house was only one hour away. But she didn’t feel safe that morning. She knew something was wrong.
“Hey, young girl… where are you going? “an old man tried talking to her, she ran away as fast as she could.
She recognized that voice from somewhere. But she didn’t know from where it was.
Ally tried to call Sarah; she didn’t reply.
After that she tried to call her mother three times.
“Mom, can you come pick me up at the maple street 5 please? “, she finally answered her call.
“Ally, what are you doing outside? It’s nearly 4 am!!“
Ally knew that and she was really sorry.
“I know mom, please just pick me up. You can punish me afterwards. “, that’s everything Ally wanted that morning.
Her mom arrived after 20 minutes; she was angry but not for too long.
Ally was still thinking about that old man’s voice. She knew him, but it was hard to find out from where she knew him.
She arrived at home and immediately went to bed. She started thinking about the rumours again… were there really nudes from her? In the internet?
But there was something that worried her more: the voice.
She finally found out from where she knew the voice.
Chapter 2: volunteer work
When Ally was fourteen years old, she signed herself up for volunteer work.
She had to sell pictures together with other kids in her age. The money was for a good purpose.
To be more precise, they donated for the animals in the sea. They were in danger.
She had to work two weeks, but she had fun doing it.
Her dad left when she was fourteen, so she tried to distract herself with that work. It was hard for her, but better for her family.
Her parents were always fighting, it was so loud… even the neighbours told them to shut up.
When her dad left, she felt like she lost everything. But she never talked about that.
She started writing a diary to confess her feelings.
“Mom, I’m leaving for work “,
that was her first day working at the charity house.
“Ok honey, but make sure to eat something before you leave “.
Her mom always used to check up on her, after her dad left. She could feel the pain that Ally was going through.
She took the bus and arrived after 15 minutes. Ally was so excited to help the animals.
“Hello Kids, thank you all for being here. Today is the first day and the first step we make, to save the animals from suffering “.
That’s how the boss introduced them into the charity work.
Ally had to pair up with some of the kids. The first step was to draw some pictures.
It didn’t matter what was on the pictures, it depended on how they sold them.
The kids had strict instructions on what to say or how to act, but they all did great.
In the end, they had enough money to save the animals.
There were a lot of sea animals or beautiful places, drawn by the kids.
Ally drew a shark; it was her fathers’ favourite animal.
“Please, describe your pictures and tell us something about why you choose to draw that “, that was the next task.
Helens picture was kind of sad but also very impressive. She was really good at drawing.
It was a little girl crying, while thinking about her parents.
Maybe something about Helens past?
When it was finally Ally’s turn, she decided to lie about her drawing.
“It is a shark because that was the first sea animal that came to my mind. “, she didn’t want to tell anybody about her father leaving them.
They would know about where all the bruises on her leg came from.
But she never told anyone.
And that’s why she was so brave, always the happy girl even though she was suffering.
The day was slowly coming to an end. The boss, Mr. Lore wanted to talk to Ally.
“Hey… your name was Ally, right? That shark is really beautiful!! I like it “, that’s what he told her that evening before everything changed.
Ally was thankful, she rarely received compliments
She had to leave because her mother was waiting.
When Ally arrived at home, she told her mother about the day. She was really happy, and she didn’t think about her dad.
While they were eating dinner, Ally told her mother about Mr. Lore and the compliment she received.
“Wow, that’s really kind… but be careful honey “, that’s what her mother told her.
Ally still blamed herself for everything that happened after.
They finished eating dinner and After Ally took a shower, she tried to call her father.
The phone rang 10 times and he didn’t reply. It wasn’t late, he just didn’t want to talk to her. She tried to sleep, but she couldn’t
So, she took a piece of paper and a pencil. Ally started drawing. She drew her mother and her father, five years ago, when they were still in love with each other. After she finished drawing, she took her diary out of her bag.
She started writing
“Dear Diary, I miss having a family. I know it’s better for both of us, my mother and me. He used to throw things at us. Everything I did was wrong; it was all my fault. I know that.
But I still miss him. I miss all the good memories we had, not the bruises on my neck from him trying to strangle me. Or the nose bleeds I’ve got from the punch in my face.
But what hurt me the most, were his words.
He always told me that everything was my fault and that I wasn’t good enough. Now I’m here, trying to do everything right. Crying at 2 am because I think I’m the dumbest person alive “.
After Ally finished writing, she decided to go to bed. The next day was going to be a long day again… she had to work again.
“Good morning sweetheart “, her mother was standing in front of her bed.
Ally didn’t sleep well that night, but she couldn’t change that.
So, she got up and put on a hoodie with black jeans. She was running late, that’s why she skipped breakfast.
When she arrived at work, the kids were already trying to sell their pictures.
“I’m sorry Mr. Lore, I’m late. “, that wasn’t usual for Ally. She felt ashamed.
“That Is no Problem Ally, we can spend the time together… talking about some private things maybe? “, Ally didn’t know that there was something wrong with that sentence. She was too young.
They started talking about different things like favourite food, colours and ended up talking about relationships.
Ally talked about relationships with an almost 40 years older man.
“No, I don’t have a boyfriend “, Ally replied.
Mr. Lore, or Bryce, that’s how Ally could call him after that day, started to smile.
He complimented her a lot, nothing wrong with that… right?
Wrong. It’s not okay for an old man to talk like this to a little girl.
But Ally was too young to notice it.
After the others returned, they asked Ally what she was doing.
“I was- “, “she was already done with her work “, Bryce interrupted her.
That was the moment, where she realized that something was wrong with Mr. Lore. He wasn’t a normal boss.
But she didn’t care much that day.
She was waiting for her mom to come. She promised Ally to drive her home that day.
Everyone was already gone; Ally was the last… and Mr. Lore.
Bryce was 54 years old, when he met Ally.
“Isn’t your mom coming, Ally? “
Ally replied: “No, I don’t think so… I’m going to walk home. “
He offered Ally to drive her home, she didn’t want to… but she had no choice.
She had to sit next to him in the car because there was a lot of stuff in the back.
It was almost six o’clock in the evening, when it happened.
They were talking. He tried to build trust with Ally.
Ally had no one to talk to, that’s why she trusted her boss from a charity work. She told him everything about her life, everything she wrote down in her diary. That was definitely a big mistake.
“My father left… “
It was the moment, Bryce knew, she had no one that could save her from his actions. One reason more from him to do inappropriate things.
But he didn’t.
When they arrived at Ally’s house, he gave her a small piece of paper.
“Call me if you need to “
Ally got out of the car. She was angry but thankful at the same time.
He drove her, but he also made her feel something weird.
Maybe, it was because Ally felt like she needed a new father figure in her life. Her mother stopped being there for here after that day.
“Mom, I’m home “
Her mom, Jenna, wasn’t at home. Something was definitely wrong; her mother never left the house since her husband left them.
So, she tried to call her, and her mother replied.
“Honey, I can’t come home. Order pizza or something… see you “
She started asking herself: “is everything my fault? “
Ally wasn’t hungry. She was sad and all she could think about was what her mother was doing. Maybe she was with another man? Or another family?
Ally wanted to tell her mother about Bryce aka Mr. Lore… but her mother wasn’t here.
She had no one to talk to, again.
She opened her diary and started writing like usual.
I feel like I don’t belong into that world. At first my dad left, now my mom is probably getting drunk because I’m a failure. And a weird man is talking to me, like I belong to him.
I don’t know what to do. Today I opened up to Mr. Lore, the weird man who’s talking to me. It was kind of helpful and he gave me his phone number… just in case, if somethings wrong.
Now I’m considering, whether or not I should call him.
Maybe I should end it all?
Sometimes, ending it all is the only option. But I’m afraid. “
She went to bed and woke up being alone again, her mother didn’t return.
After a week was almost over, it was the last day for Ally working.
They had enough money for the animals, so they didn’t have to sell more pictures that day. Some kids still did.
Mr. Lore and other charity workers offered them to eat lunch for free.
Ally was starving, she didn’t eat for days because her mother wasn’t at home.
“Can we talk, after lunch? “
Bryce was sitting next to Ally.
She was afraid to say no. So, they did talk after lunch.
Mr. Lore wanted to make sure if everything was fine, with her family. Nothing was fine. She told him what happened with her mother. While talking to Bryce, her hands were shaking. She started crying in front of everyone including Mr. Lore.
“Let’s go inside, where nobody is watching us. “
She should not have listened to Mr. Lore.
They went into the house, and he was right. Nobody was in there.
He told her to sit on the chair and calm down. Ally listened to him. She felt like Mr. Lore was the first person to understand her, since her parents left.
Ally was still shaking, Mr. Lore started placing his hands on her legs. She immediately froze.
“What’s wrong? you aren’t going to tell anybody about this… are you? “
Bryce was looking at her like he wanted to hurt her.
She promised him not to tell anybody.
The 54- Years old men started kissing her on the head. He told Ally how nice she was.
She was sitting on a chair, while an old man was touching her. She couldn’t do anything.
She was scared but she had hope.
Maybe someone could have saved her, from being mentally unstable for the next few years?
But no one did.
On that day, Bryce touched and kissed her. But he didn’t do more than that.
He knew, it wasn’t the right time for that.
Someone knocked at the door. The knock was like a special code.
It knocked exactly four times.
“Bryce, it’s me Jason. “
Jason, one of the older workers, came in.
Bryce was still touching her, and he didn’t care about the fact, that Jason was watching them.
“Please help me, this man is doing weird things to me “, that’s what her 14-years old self said to Mr. Brooklet.
Mr. Brooklet aka Jason didn’t care about her. He just told Bryce that everyone left.
“It’s still not the right time for me, Jason “, Bryce replied.
Chapter 3: The voice
After that night on Ray’s party, when an older man tried to talk to her, Ally tried everything to find out whose voice it was.
She grabbed her Diary and read all the pages. Until she finally read the pages about her week in the charity house. She took a look back, to when her father left.
After she did that charity work, her mother left too. Her mother was an alcoholic. She was only fourteen and stayed alone at home, but the police didn’t find out that time.
Her mother returned after two years, when Ally turned sixteen.
She remembered Mr. Lore and what he did to her… in fact, she never forgot.
But now she recognized the voice… It was Mr. Brooklet.
One of the charity workers.
He knew exactly what Bryce did to her, but he didn’t help her.
Maybe Mr. Brooklet was like him?
Ally wanted revenge for herself, but she had already tried to find Mr. Lore.
She didn’t succeed.
The only way to receive justice for herself, was to contact Mr. Brooklet.
Ally tried to make a plan.
She had never told anyone about Mr. Lore and the story from three years ago.
At first, she wanted to write a letter to Mr. Brooklet.
“Dear Mr. Brooklet, You may remember me… the girl that got abused by Mr. Lore. Or were there many other girls? Let’s describe myself. I have black hair and brown eyes. My name is Ally. It was three years ago, when everything happened. “
She stopped writing.
That was definitely the wrong idea. She needed to do something more powerful, Ally has really lost herself since that happened.
Her mother came into her room, while Ally had her laptop wide open.
“Mr. Brooklet Charity house “
That was the Page, Ally had searched up in the internet.
“Ally, what are you doing? “, her mother asked.
Ally was surprised because her mother was sober. The first time, since she returned.
She wasn’t ready to tell her about what happened three years ago, but her mother wanted to know it.
She also saw the drawings from Mr. Lore touching her, in the diary.
“What is that? “, her mother was curious.
Ally told her that it was for a school project from years ago.
Jenna believed her.
After she left her room, Ally decided to give up.
It wasn’t right, she could not change what has happened years ago. The only thing that Ally could do was to move on.
She took her phone and tried to call Sarah.
“Hey Ally, I haven’t heard from you in a long while? “, they had school holidays and Sarah was on vacation for one week.
Ally wanted to spend the last day with her.
“Hey Sarah, would you like to go out today? “
After they talked for 10 minutes, they decided to meet with some boys.
Ray, Jackson and Steve.
Sarah’s friends didn’t really like to spend time with Ally, but they were sorry for her.
Sorry, because she lost her dad and she had no friends in middle school.
Sarah was her only friend, even though there were many rumours going around.
While they were hanging out on the streets, Ally received a call.
“Ally, could you please come home? I’m hungry “, her mother was drunk again, and they had no food at home.
Ally was a good person… she left her “friends “.
While walking down the streets, there was a man staring at her.
“Stop, don’t walk away “, the man shouted at her.
Ally pretend to be on a phone call, the man disappeared.
She was scared and she knew it couldn’t go on like this anymore.
When she arrived at home, with food for her mother, there were a lot of people in their house.
“Mom, who are this people? “, Ally asked annoyed.
One of them was Jenna’s new boyfriend… the others were some alcoholic strangers.
In the same evening, after everyone left… including her mother, Ally decided to tell Sarah about the voice.
But Sarah didn’t believe Ally, after they were talking for an hour.
Her best friend didn’t believe her, Jenna was never at home and her dad left.
She was on her own, again.
Ally decided to write in her Diary, the only way to understand herself.
Today I’ve realized, that I only have myself left. Again.
The voice is driving me insane; I just need to know who this man is.
I’m not giving up even though I’m all alone.
I know that I’m strong enough and I can beat this.
And if not, there are other options… like ending everything forever.
Good night “
Chapter 4: the last night
Ally woke up, the school holidays were over.
After she slipped into her sneakers and put on an oversize hoodie, she decided to walk to school.
No train today.
While she was walking down the streets, she thought about the voice again.
Ally had a plan.
“Today in the evening, I’m going to ruin that voice. “, Ally was talking to herself.
She had no one.
She tried to talk to Sarah, as soon as she arrived to school. Sarah didn’t reply.
She ignored her.
Something was definitely wrong; everyone was staring at her. Like she killed someone.
Some kids even threw things at her.
“Slut “, Ally was confused after they started calling her names.
She now knew what was up.
Sarah posted photos of her, she did them when Ally was changing her clothes.
But she posted them anonymously.
How could she do that to her best friend?
Ally didn’t care, she was still thinking about the voice.
She left school, before the lesson has even started.
6 hours later, after Ally tried to make a plan again… she decided to go.
She didn’t care about the plan anymore, she just wanted to walk down the street where the voice began.
It was late, maybe 9 pm.
The sky was red, it was a beautiful view.
“Hello, who is here? “, Ally wasn’t afraid anymore.
She felt a hand on her shoulder, before her last moment of peace was taken away.
She couldn’t move.
She could see her life passing by.
Her clothes were torn from her body.
She screamed, but there was no sound. It felt like drowning.
Five painful minutes, where the rapist took away everything she had left.
And her mind.
It was a beautiful red summer night, before I felt like my body wasn’t mine anymore.
The sky was so pretty, the sunset reminded me of when everything was fine.
Thank you, mom, for being here for me after dad left us. I’m sorry for being a disappointment to you.
Thank you, dad, even if you hated me… I loved you.
Sarah, you were my best friend. My only friend… I was kind of confused because we stopped talking and then you published those pictures of me.
Don’t know if you’re happy now, but I hope so because you deserve to be happy.
I don’t have many other people but to everyone that reads this after I’m gone…
I’m sorry that I gave up. I know that it was my fault.
Please take care of yourself. Never eat your worries.
Talk to someone.
You’re worth it.